Dennis
Blue penguin Colony
Oamaru
South Island
New Zealand
DOB - 10/99
VITAL STATS - ?
LOCATION - Blue Penguin colony, Oamaru, New Zealand
INTERESTS - Water Skiing, Stamp Collecting, Ornithology, watching birds
MUSIC - Abba, Paper Lace, Janes Addiction, Dvorjak
FAV SONG - International Velvet - Catatonia
Dennis left Britain on Thursday, 4th of November, 1999. He went to spend some time with Dave Houston, a ranger with the Department of Conservation in Oamaru, New Zealand. Dave is also vice-chaiman of the Oamaru Blue Penguin Colony management committee and also holds the banding permit for thatspecies. Dennis was sent on his journey equipped with a disposable camera and a clean set of underwear. His mission was to assist Dave in his work and to build up his own knowledge and understanding of his feathered relatives. Conservation and wildlife protection are very close to Dennis' heart and he wanted to experience the problems faced by the penguins (and other animals) first hand. So far it seems that he's been doing as much socialising as he has work. He's met the ex-president, the mayor of Oamaru and even dragged Dave to a Doobie Brothers concert in Queenstown. Unfortunately it rained but Dave managed to get a break from the non-stop partying much to Dennis' disappointment. Dennis was testing a new predator-proof fence at Macraes Flats by pretending to be bait. I reckon that Dave was just getting his own back for all the late nights he's had recently!
Dennis's Gallery
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Email Correspondence
From: Guy Wooles
To: Dave Houston
Subject: Penguin Project
Date: Wednesday, Oct. 27th, 1999
Dear Dave,
My name is Guy Wooles and I am currently in my 3rd year at the University of Western England (Bristol) studying Fine Art in Context. My latest project involves conservation and wildlife protection issues. For the past three weeks I have been creating penguins out of newspaper in preparation for a residency and to develop my own style of practice. One of my creations recently asked if he could have a holiday. Being a kind and considerate person I agreed to see what I could do. His name is Dennis (as in hopper(!!)), and he stands approximately 12-16 inches tall. I am writing, and hoping, that you might be willing to take Dennis for a few days and take some photographs of him with his cousins and the surrounding areas, plus anything else you think he would like to see. He would, of course, bring his own camera and return ticket. Joking aside, I would like to give Dennis his own history and background besides the ones that have been crumpled up to create him. This might all sound a bit crazy but I believe it could be an interesting experience for him(!) and for myself and perhaps help put across some serious issues regarding waste and conservation amongst others. I do hope you can help me in this project and I look forward to hearing from you soon.
My e-mail address is Guy@**********.co.uk
All the best
Guy
From: Dave Houston
To: Guy@**********.co.uk
Subject: Dennis
Date: Friday, October 29, 1999 11:54 AM
If Dennis wanted to come over for a look around, I would be pleased to introduce him to some of his feathered relatives.
Cheers,
Dave Houston
Department of Conservation
P.O.Box 388,
Oamaru,
New Zealand
Thought for the day:
Consciousness (n): that annoying time between naps.
From: Guy Wooles
To: Dave Houston
Subject: Dennis
Date: Saturday, Oct 30th, 1999
Dave,
Thanks very much for offering to take Dennis for a few, he's over moon. As soon as he's packed he'll be 'winging' his way over to you. Just to give you some idea of what to expect I'll tell you his history so far.
Dennis is the first penguin I made for this project and was created using only photographs in books as a guideline. So he might look like a cross between a number of penguins! I realise that he should be at least two and a half feet tall but he is only a few weeks old.
Dennis is made entirely out of paper and plain old sellotape but he is quite solid. I haven't painted him because I quite like him the way he is. I didn't want to hide the fact that he's made of waste material.
Please don't worry if you damage him, just stick him back together if you can. I expect him to come back a little 'travel weary' anyway.
Was my e-mail dated 18/6/99? My computer is playing up and puts weird dates on everything. If not ignore the last question!
So, anyway, thanks again for the prompt reply and Dennis wants to know whether he can call you 'Uncle Dave'?
Good luck in the Rugby. I'm rooting for New Zealand (I think) 'cos I'm Welsh and so is Dennis. Oh, and thanks for Graham Henry!
Iechyd Da ('cheers' in Welsh)
Guy
From: Dave Houston
To: Guy Wooles
Subject: Re: Dennis
Date: Saturday, October 30, 1999 9:36 PM
I look forward to Dennis' arrival. He might get a yacht trip to Stewart Island to survey Yellow-eyed penguins if he behaves. Will see some blue penguins and might even see some Fiordland-crested's.
Yes, you computer still thinks it's June.
Kia Ora,
Uncle Dave
Thought for the day:
Logic (n): the art of being wrong with confidence.
From: Guy Wooles
To: Dave Houston
Subject: Incoming Dennis
Date: Thursday, November 04, 1999 10:07 PM
Dave,
I have just waved Dennis off at the Post Office.They tell me he'll take about a week to get to you so he should be with you around next Friday. You wouldn't believe the problems I had trying to get him packed. He's not too heavy, but if I'd put him in a box he would of been too big to send Air Mail due to his odd dimensions. Are your penguins as much trouble?
So he's snugly packed in a heavy duty bag wearing cardboard helmet and boots! You'll laugh when you see him. I hope he's not too pissed off with me when he arrives. He's got his camera with him so I hope it survives the journey.
If you keep his packing and his bag then you can send him back the same way, if he does't complain too much. He weighs approx. 1.57kg, so when he arrives if you could let me know how much it's going to cost to send him back in New Zealand money I can send you a cheque or transfer the money to you. The little man at the Post Orifice said that this would be the easiest way otherwise I'd be sending you hundreds of International Reply Coupons.
I am hoping that he has no problems getting through customs, it would ruin his holiday if he had to endure an internal body cavity search-oooohh owww!
I was wondering, if you had a spare film, could you take some back-up photos just in case his photos don't come out due to airport x-ray machines or something? Then if they didn't come out you'd have a spare set. I'd pay for the film, of course. If this is going to be a pain in the butt, don't worry, I'm sure the camera will be fine.
If you could let me know when he arrives, that would be great.
Thanks very much,
Guy
PS Sorry to hear about the All Blacks. Bloody French! What with British Beef and now this, eh!
Cheers
From: Dave Houston
To: Guy Wooles
Subject: Re: Incoming Dennis
Date: Thursday, November 11, 1999 6:00 AM
G'day,
Dennis arrived a couple of days ago, but hasn't seen much because I've been out of town. He wasn't subjected to any embarrasing internal body cavity searches.
I've decided not to take Dennis to Stewart Island next week, instead he is spending the time with Denis, the manager of the Oamaru Blue Penguin Colony. I'll install him on Friday night and introduce him to a few of his small feathered relatives.
I'll drop you a note when I get back to let you know how he's getting on.
Cheers,
Dave Houston
Thought for the day:
Flashlight (n): A case for holding dead batteries
From: Guy Wooles
To: Dave Houston
Subject: Dennis' Holiday
Date: Thursday, November 11, 1999 9:19 PM
Hi, Dave,
Glad to hear the old bird is okay and that he hasn't suffered any embarassing experiences. Thought I'd better tell you that Dennis does like his beer and he has my permission to go down the pub if he wishes (he is Welsh after all !). If he gets too frisky mention the dark night in Cardiff and the one legged pigeon- that usually sobers him up pretty sharpish!
A weird thing happened the other weekend I thought I'd tell you about. I was talking to my partners mother about this project and she mentioned that she went to a penguin colony in Oamaru last year. She said that she had spoken to a man who was looking after the penguins along with a younger man and she said his name was Dave something. Was that you???
Talk about small world if it was, eh!?
Anyway, say thanks to Denis for looking after Dennis while you are away.
Have a good trip,
Guy
P.S. Feel free to take whatever photos you think would be good (or funny). Cheers.
From: Dave Houston
To: Guy wooles
Subject: Re: Dennis' Holiday
Date: Thursday, November 11, 1999 11:34 PM
It most likely was me!
From: Guy Wooles
To: Dave Houston
Subject: Penguin on holiday
Date: Sunday, December 05, 1999 3:22 PM
Hiya Dave
How are things on the other side of the world? They're pretty lousy on this side. How was your trip to Stewart Island? Did you get to see any Fiordland-cresteds? How many species do you actually look after and how many penguins in total does that make? I hope that, at this time of year, you're up to your knees in Blue and Yellow-eyed penguin chicks, not to mention all the others in New Zealand. Has it been a good year in terms of successfully raised chicks?
Yesterday, my girlfriend and I went to Bristol Zoo to see their new Seal and Penguin Coast. What a fantastic exhibit! I don't know whether you've heard about it, but it's definitely one of the best enclosures I've seen. They have Gentoo, Magellanic and two King penguins all sited down in, what looks like, a natural sea cove that has a wave machine sending the water crashing on the rocks. There is a kind of cliff walk that extends above and around the back of the enclosure for the penguins, giving them views across the rest of the zoo. They've also created a tunnel that goes beneath the water, giving you a crabs-eye view of the swimming penguins. I didn't realise how beautiful and graceful they are underwater- like fat rugby balls with eyes! All in all they've done a fine job of trying to create as natural an environment for the penguins as they can in the middle of smelly old Bristol. Do you have any contacts at the zoo? Because next year I was hoping to send one of Dennis' brothers or sisters to them for a working residency- I know they are heavily involved in conservation and education. My girlfriend is a Biologist and runs an environment and conservation club at the school where she works. She invited Stephen Woollard from Bristol Zoo to a careers conference she organised one year. Do you know him? Is this the man I should be contacting? One word answers are acceptable!
Anyway, now I've bored the pants off you about Bristol Zoo, how's the old bird? Is he behaving himself? If he is, then it's a first. What's he been up to, the lucky b*****d? I hope it hasn't been an incovenience to you 'cos you must be extremely busy this time of year. If you get a chance to drop me a quick note to let me know how he is that would be great, if not don't worry. I'm sure he's in good hands. Just don't let him lead you astray. Dennis doesn't know the meaning of the words "just a quick beer" or "don't "! You know that picture of you on your website, is that really an Albatross or is it actually an overweight Husky?
This short note to find out how you're doing has turned into a short novel, hasn't it? The sun has probably risen and set whilst you were reading this and you've missed your tea. If so, I appologise, I just reckon you've got one of the best jobs I can think of.
I'll leave you to save the environment now.
Many thanks,
Guy
P.S. Do you know Simon King, the wildlife photographer from the BBC? I'm trying to get hold of him because one of Dennis' brothers wants to go and work with him on one of his trips!
Anyway, I've overstayed my welcome, bye.
From: Dave Houston
To: Guy Wooles
Subject: Re: Penguin on holiday
Date: Tuesday, December 07, 1999 5:44 AM
Guy,
Stewart Island was great, but I'm glad I didn't take Dennis along for the ride, because I fear the drenching he would have got would have been fatal.
The yacht that we stayed on for the first week got a bit of a pounding on the way down and was wet inside and out. The fact that it rained for the next few days didn't improve things much either. It did however clear up for the second week and we were able to bask in the sun.
Got to see lots of Fiordland crested penguins and their chicks, but were disappointed about the low number of yellow-eyed nests we found. Also saw lots of blue penguins, but also saw a good number that had been munched by cats.
It's too early to say how good the penguin season is, or rather, how bad. We are having having another la nina year and they are not good for penguins. We expect poor breeding success and low juvenile survival, but won't really see what happens till February or later.
I had some email correspondence with someone at Bristol zoo re a link to their web site, but that was my only contact. Must look at the web page again to see how the exhibit has progressed. Dennis has been working at the Oamaru Blue Penguin Colony while I've been away. He's helped out with some nest monitoring and showed our Prime Minister around the colony one evening (well ex prime minister now, we just had an election last week). I'll introduce him to the Mayor next week if I get a chance. We'll get out and check some yellow-eyed penguin nests next week and after that I'll get him to give me a hand up at Macraes Flat with some predator monitoring work and fencing in a rare lizard reserve. I forgot to ask, has he any fencing, welding or tractor driving experience?
I'm at Macraes at the moment, doing the above tasks, but supposed to be doing lizard survey work, but the weather isn't co-operating. Just hear the generator stop - better go and get dinner on for the troops.
Cheers,
Dave Houston
Thought for the day: Originality (n): The art of concealing your sources.
From: Guy Wooles
To: Dave Houston
Subject: Dennis' DIY skills
Date: Tuesday, December 07, 1999 2:07 AM
Hi,Dave
Just a quick note to let you know that Dennis is well trained in most martial arts. So he should be of some use to you in combatting those predators. He recently became a black belt in Origami. As to welding and fencing, for some reason he has a slight phobia about fire- and if you mention 'fencing' to him he'll think that you'll want him to get rid of some 'dodgy' gear! He is capable of driving most vehicles but, unfortunately, has had his licence taken from him due being drunk in charge of his tricyle (I told him not to go out with the penguins from down the road- so it's his own fault!).
Has he run out of film for his camera yet? I can't wait to see them. Did he get his picture taken with the ex-PM and did you vote for him.
At the moment I'm trying to get some sponsorship from McVities Penguin biscuits so that I can set up a website around this adventure. They'll probably think I'm mad- maybe I am! This whole project has ballooned and everyone keeps asking me how Dennis is. I've been encouraged by my tutors to expand, I'm now trying to get one of Dennis' brothers into the Whitehouse. I'll have to tell them he doesn't like cigars! I also want to send one of the family to the North Pole, I understand it'll be the first penguin to the North Pole!? If this fails I'm still holding out for Tom 'the voice' Jones!
Do you have any suggestions for Dennis' brothers and sisters that might help your cause because I'd love to help- especially through my website?
Anyway, I'll keep you posted. Oh, and make sure you don't burn the toast!
Keep smiling,
Guy